How you feel about yourself privately will be your road map through life. For many of us living and learning hurts. Nothing is more painful than to see your child, or yourself for that matter struggle with social, emotional, academic, or vocational frustrations. For those of us identified as being ADD or ADHD we find ourselves operating from a perpetual come-from-behind-position. During the past two years, the pandemic has fertilized anxiety, uncertainty, and doubt. Depression and loneliness have exponentially increased, leaving children and adults, not knowing what to do next. The pandemic aside, these are common experiences of children and adults with ADD and ADHD. The author knows this story all too well. In second grade, Tom's teacher strapped a piece of masking tape across his mouth sitting him in front of the class, because, in her words, "He won't stop talking." During his post high school planning his counselor informed him "You are not college material, and you better learn to run a cash register." Tom knew if he could learn how to learn his way, things would work out. And they have. Unlike other books in this genre, these writings will make you laugh, and resuscitate your spirit. The author's education, training, and clinical experiences, coupled with his candid personal history is a compelling read. We can find parts of ourselves in all of it. Most importantly the book will inspire you to understand yourself, and others from different perspectives. You will learn about the newest discoveries in interpersonal neurobiology, and psychology, combined with ancient wisdom, taking you on a fascinating path of self-discovery. It may surprise you to realize that "getting better," has more to do with letting go, than holding on. This journey will help you learn how to make now better, so later will be easier. In this book you will learn about: *Creating a language of comfort *The importance of learning to pause*Your brain's warring factions-the irascible amygdala and the loving prefrontal cortex *When mad covers sad*When crying is good*The inestimable value of brain sit-ups *Creating stable traits rather than fleeting states *Why patience and compassion are the ultimate motivators *Being reflective rather than reactive *The need to unlearn learned helplessness * When blaming makes you the victim * The friendship mission- a life sustaining need *Learning to become comfortable with discomfort *Why the quadpod concept is basic to wellbeing *Understandin